New Year’s Resolutions: 2019 Edition

new years resolutions 2019

We celebrated our ninth anniversary with the New Year. When you’ve been married nine years and you’re a parent to a nearly two-year-old, anniversary celebrations are simple.

We both went to work in the morning. I came home to a small bouquet with a red rose, daisies, a pink carnation, snap dragons and baby’s breath.

…the cat was chewing on it.

He came home to the trashcan at the curb — usually his job — a fussy toddler and half a salmon carcass cooked to NEAR perfection.

baked salmon and potatoes with lemon

I’m not a great cook, but it was pretty!

For 2019, my husband and I have a slew of New Year’s Resolutions. We figure, if we cast a wide net, we’ll catch something.

Right?

For example, one of my resolutions is to take a photo every time I accidentally open Instagram Stories, which happens often enough and always when I look a mess.

I’ve discovered filters help.

“Getting our s*** together” is the theme of 2019. Let’s break it down.

Finance

When you’ve had more than one job over the course of your working life, you might leave little bits of retirement all over the place. Sometimes, those little bits of retirement don’t cross-pollenate. In the end, you’re left with… a lot of mail.

Our greatest investment success has been adding money to our son’s college fund.

In 2019, we’re getting the rest of our investment s*** together.

Fitness

Lapsed gym memberships, workout-related injuries and the general exhaustion of sharing a household with a human toddler knocked both of us off the fit-living wagon in 2018.

And, let’s be honest, in 2017.

In 2019, we’re getting our fitness s*** together.

Food

I started Noom in November 2018 during the program’s Black Friday sale. One of the daily lessons talked about “decision fatigue.”

Decision Fatigue

We made a lot of fatigued decisions about food in 2018 — made even easier by the availability of food delivery services. Uber Eats, anyone? Did you know Chipotle delivers? That was the nail in my tummy coffin.

In 2019, we’re getting our s*** together. (Without Noom. #foreshadowing)

Fouse (House — I ran out of F’s.)

Homeownership is almost as exhausting as toddler rearing. We’ve got a laundry list of things we want to repair, replace and rip out in the house, including a laundry room.

High school classes should have taught me how to care for a house, but the only thing I can remember from my home economics class is not to store potatoes under the sink. Which, honestly, should be common knowledge.

Know what I should have learned? Which household materials might contain asbestos.

That would have been helpful.

Anyway, we’re getting the house s*** together in 2019, too.

And Time

I’m 12 days late posting my New Year’s resolutions. Happy 2018… late.

#bestnine2018

year of color 2019

In 2019, I’m getting my calendar s*** together.

BABR: December Update

December wasn’t quite as busy as November.

Thankfully.

Our days were still full. Coffee. Work. Toddler nonsense. Family time. And a very merry Christmas.

Let’s start with coffee.

easy to shop for coffee mugs

I’m wicked easy to shop for. I will never not need coffee.

Of course, one cup of hot tea cracked the beautiful blue mug at the end, which is what I get for cheating on coffee with tea. Anyone know if this milk trick actually works? Well, I’ll try it and let you know.

The office was filled with holiday cheer this month with nearly two weeks of merry activities and a nice Christmas Eve to New Year’s Day holiday break.

First, we filled ourselves with sweets.

christmas donuts from the donut whole in wichita kansas

“First” like we didn’t do this the entire two weeks. I certainly did.

Took fun holiday photos.

shae is santa

Shhh! I’m Santa.

And we played elves by giving the office a good cleaning.

shae dusts and drinks coffee

The toddler developed a couple less desirable talents. The pterodactyl scream is making a comeback, and fit-throwing is our go-to to get our way. He also can now get himself into these…

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“Time to eat, people.”

He had another pretty cute “Time to eat, people” situation before Christmas lunch.

toddler climbs himself into a chair

toddler climbs himself into stroller

“Don’t talk to me. Don’t read to me. Don’t touch me. Don’t even look at me. Just let me sit in my stroller and watch Peppa. …Mom. Stop taking pictures of me.”

He was pretty pooped (read: cranky) after two play days in a row with his cousins and surviving on a car nap alone.

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Never again.

My husband was able to spend Christmas Eve, Christmas and the two days after the holiday with us before returning to work, so we had plenty of family time this month.

We wrapped presents and watched A Christmas Carol on Christmas Eve. Christmas morning, we headed over to my in-laws’ to celebrate the season.

My toddler had a good haul. Cleaning supplies (so he stays out of mine). A hammer-ball-bonk toy that he’s real into. A boatload of lego duplos for mommy to build and him to destroy. And a car.

His Shocker hat stays on his head for hours at a time — thank you, Grandma — and his Spiderman helmet was only annoying to him for a little bit — thank you, Aunt and Uncle.

Santa brought us a handmade busy book (sewn by the busy little elves at twobusylittlebees.com) and, by the time he opened it, he was too pooped to play with it.

twobusylittlebees busy books

My husband and I gifted each other kitchen things, as we do nearly every holiday. This year, we replaced our nine-year-old blender and found a better way to store knives. The blender is awesome, but we haven’t installed our under-the-cabinet knife storage unit yet.

Mostly because the house was a disaster.

We didn’t even host. Just normal, day-to-day destruction on top of special, holiday destruction.

Our family gifted us experiences this year, too. A renewed membership to the Sedgwick County Zoo and a new membership to Botanica Wichita.

Speaking of Botanica…

We went to see the lights. Alongside the entire state of Kansas. Illuminations was a crowded Christmas Eve Eve holiday adventure — and we’re definitely going on a Tuesday next year — but it was beautiful.

And I got my Santa picture in the knick of time! (Before he went back to the North Pole to prepare for Christmas Eve, of course.)

Henry-Santa2018_12

Hope your holidays were merry and bright. Except today, of course. I hope today the lights are dimmed.

Happy New Year.

Noom 35 Days In

befriend breakfast with noom

I didn’t cancel Noom.

Today marks the beginning of Week 6, the end of the week-long break I took from Nooming for Christmasing… and four-ish pounds lost.

Noom Week 5 End

I started this weight-loss program at 146.4 pounds. During the last 35 days, I have:

  • Weighed myself everyday
  • Switched from no-breakfast (or an Rx bar) to a dairy-free breakfast smoothie every morning because Noom Keystone Habit #1 is to Befriend Breakfast — recipes to follow in a later blog
  • Learned six more Noom Keystone Habits and all the #PsycheTricks and #PracticalTips Noom can shove into a hashtag (Oh, and a ton of other things.)
  • Made conscious decisions about what I ate for lunch — and only went out to eat once while I was at the office!
  • Sometimes gotten my steps in (and blew them out of the water on cleaning day at the office)
  • Entered custom dishes for dinners throughout, which I LOVE doing
  • “Passed” most of my Noom quizzes, except when I was tired and couldn’t remember what friggin’ acronym they decided to use for a term that really didn’t need an acronym

I have not:

  • Eaten the appropriate green-yellow-red ratio — but I have added arugula to nearly everything just so I can say I ate greens
  • Used Noom’s personalized “workout plan” (read: disappointing PDF)
  • Stopped eating salty and sweet treats (Seriously, all month I’ve been surrounded by chocolate. It’s December.)

And I lost four-ish pounds.

In December.

Surrounded by chocolate I didn’t stop myself from eating.

Maybe it works ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Remember: “Abs are made in the kitchen.”

While I’m not a fan of all Noomisms, including the acronyms for everything and hashtag bonanza happening in every daily lesson, their #PsycheTricks and #PracticalTips seem to work for me.

I learned about all-or-nothing thinking (“I’m just going to be in pain anyway, so why bother working out?”), decision fatigue and why weight loss/maintenance is so hard SCIENTIFICALLY for people who have already lost weight.

It’s stupid metabolism’s fault.

In addition, while I understand the purpose of the Goal Specialist — she’s there to help you — and see the value in the Group — you’re not alone, I don’t have time for either of them. Every notification buzzing on my phone throughout the day gets ignored unless it’s work-related — and nearly nothing gets my attention until 8 p.m. after the toddler’s gone to bed and I’ve had a glass of wine cup of tea.

Basically, I want the education and the food-logging functionality — it’s so much better than Fitbit’s — without the added responsibility of connecting with other humans.

I’ve already got so many humans.

If Noom could offer that and drop the price tag a tad, I think it’d be a forever solution to weight loss and maintenance for me.

Noom’s pre-determined goal weight for me is 136.8 pounds. I have no idea where this number came from — and I don’t care. I’ve got six pounds to go and four weeks (I think?) left in my subscription. We’ll see how I do.

Working Mom

I’m a working mom.

On weekdays, I spend maybe two hours with my son.

Imagine Monday morning.

I wake up, have coffee immediately, and then get ready for work — all before 7 a.m. Because at 7 a.m., my son wakes up, and we have half an hour together that consists of a diaper change, morning milk, getting him dressed and chasing him around the house to get his shoes, gloves and jacket on.

I mean, it’s time for my son to wake up 7 a.m. But sometimes he doesn’t want to wake up at 7, so he sleeps until 7:15 or 7:30.

Then we’re hurrying. And our half hour is crammed into five minutes.

Of course, sometimes he wakes up at 6:30 because he wants mommy to have gross hair and wear the same pair of pants for the second (or third) day in a row.

Hey, I’m working mom.

Now, imagine Monday evening.

After an 8-hour workday, I come home to my son… and immediately distract him, so I can make dinner, which takes 30 to 45 minutes depending on what I’m cooking.

We’re a one-pan, one-pot kind of dinner family days daddy works.

Dinner he’s of course not going to eat. Dinner is a 15 to 20 minute fight. Now, when I say “fight,” I mean I try to get him to eat the food, and he tries to feed it to me instead.

You know, unless it’s chips. He doesn’t share chips.

Hey, I’m a working mom.

Dinner is a messy, uphill, mommy-always fails kind of battle.

Here, kid, have a yogurt pouch.

After dinner, it’s time to clean up — and time for another toddler fight. I try to clean his hands and face, and he tries to cover me and his hair in whatever I failed to feed him.

Finally, somewhat fed and somewhat less sticky, it’s quality-time time. Daddy usually gets home from work around this time, so we get to spend quality-time time together as a family.

It’s lovely, but it last about half an hour — and we’ve got to shove a toddler shower and 300 bedtime stories into that half hour. Because then it’s bedtime, and the bedtime fight begins. Mommy and daddy nearly always win the bedtime fight (knock on wood), and kiddo is sleeping like a baby by 8 p.m.

Repeat on weekdays that end in “y,” and there you have it. The household routine. Maybe two hours a day I spend with my son, and at least an hour of toddler arguments about the things we’re doing when we’re spending time together.

Weekends are better. Breakfasts and lunches are easier. Naptimes are less of a fight than bedtimes, if you could believe it.

But weekdays are trying. Weekdays are exhausting. They’re sometimes sad and sometimes painful.

People call it “mom guilt.” Being away from your child for any extended period of time. I don’t feel guilt. I’m not doing anything to feel guilty about.

I do feel loss.

I lose hours, or I lose moments. Time necessary to build a bond with my growing, changing child.

He doesn’t remember the nine months he spent in-womb or the 13 months I was his main source of nutrition. He’s a toddler. His brain is making connections, and one of the connections it’s making is that I’m not with him for eight hours a day, five days a week.

When he’s upset and wants comfort, he doesn’t always find it in me.

When he wants a story or to play, he doesn’t often turn to me.

When he wakes up in the middle of the night because he’s lost his binky or his lovey or he had a bad dream, I’m not as good a fixer as I used to be.

And sometimes it breaks me.

I love working, and I love being a working mom. I love my job. I couldn’t do a weekday that ends in “y” any other way.

I’d lose my mind.

But on some weekdays that end in “y,” I want nothing more to be at home with my son.

To the working moms out there, I feel your loss.

I don’t know how to repair it. I don’t know how to fill up the potholes along your week-long journey to Saturday. I do know you cherish every snuggle. Every tiny finger reaching to be picked up. Every cry for comfort — even when you’re elbow deep in the mop water the floors that get less attention than your hair and unshaved legs so desperately need.

Every moment you can find and take and hold forever.

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Noom 14-Day Trial

An ode to BABR…

Your biceps are flabby.
Your belly rolls are, too.
Abs are made in the kitchen.
Arms are made in the weight room.

One of my Be Pain Free tactics is to lose weight. Why? Less weight > less pressure on my spine > less pain. Super simple. I also want to build a stronger core to protect my spine. (Don’t worry. I’ll always have the rolls. I had a baby. Let’s be serious.)

Of course, you’d think I’d have a 6-pack by now walking around all day with my abdominals flexed in attempt to move pain-free from one position to LITERALLY EVERY OTHER POSITION.

But, no.

I suck at losing weight. I’m much better at eating whatever I want. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I figure a little help won’t hurt, so I signed up for a 14-day trial of Noom.

Noom is a wellness program (read: weight loss program) designed to help users live healthfully by changing habits (read: losing weight). I’m a tad pessimistic about the “wellness” claims — if that wasn’t obvious. I was annoyed to discover the personalized meal planning and workout parts of the program were add-ons and cost extra.

Necessary parts of the wellness program don’t come with it.

Seems weird for something that costs $50/month.

I also purchased the workout because they were having a Black Friday sale that made it pretty inexpensive. It’s a PDF. That was disappointing.

Noom is not a diet. It doesn’t tell people what they can and cannot eat — or provide a personalized meal plan unless you pay more — but the structure of the program is built around food and users’ psychological triggers to food. #NoomNerdsLovePsychology

They use a lot of hashtags…

Noom_10

#See.

Noom uses a three-color system to categorize food to help users make better decisions about what they choose to eat.

  • Red foods are non-so-great-for-you foods, such as red meat (delicious), doughnuts (heaven) and ice cream (my favorite).
  • Yellow foods are ok-for-you-in-moderation foods, such as lean meats, eggs and avocados.
  • Green foods are best-for-you food, such as leafy greens (not Romaine), broth-based soups and brown rice.

Green foods also have low caloric density, which means you can eat fewer calories of these foods and still feel full. Foods with high caloric density, such as almonds, have a lot of calories packed into a smaller space.

Almonds aren’t bad for you, but that trick to eat a handful of almonds when you feel the hanger probably doesn’t work because almonds won’t fill you up.

I’m behind this. Eating a handful of almonds is horrible.

The goal is to eat a well-rounded diet of each of these types of foods: 30 percent green, 45 percent yellow and 25 percent red.

Noom_5

How do you figure out if you get your ratios right? You log your food. Yes, Noom requires you to log everything you eat.

So if you hate food journals, Noom is not for you.

They makes it pretty simple, thought. Logging food is as easy as searching for it in their database. If it’s not there, you can add it. The library also has generic food items like “chicken strips,” “rose wine” and “tomato soup.” While you might not be getting the most exact recording, it’s better than not recording.

Here’s what a typical Noom day looks like:

  • Wake up, weigh in. You have to weigh yourself every day.
  • Eat breakfast, log breakfast.
  • Learn a thing. Noom walks users through a habit-changing tactic or food lesson every day.
  • Eat lunch, log lunch.
  • Get your steps in. Noom will be a pedometer through your phone, but it also connects to Fitbit. Handy (and way more accurate)!
  • Do more. You can add exercise, blood pressure and glucose levels through the app.
  • Eat dinner, log dinner.
  • End the day with a quick quiz about what you’ve learned, and then get ready for the next day.

Noom_1

Pretty easy. (Yes, that’s how much I weigh.)

Throughout the week, a Goal Specialist will help users create and meet the SMART goals for their programs. My Ultimate Goal is to Be Pain Free. Surprise, surprise. Noom also asks for an Ultimate Why. Mine is to play with son without pain.

You’ve never not been able to lift your toddler when he wants to snuggle and feel bad about it until chronic back pain.

Henry-November 2018_39

My Goal Specialist is very energetic, and I almost can’t take her seriously.

Other Noom things:

  • Noom piece-meals information to you because they don’t want to overwhelm you, according to them. I asked my Goal Specialist a bunch of question over the weekend that were answered the very next day in the “lesson.” Oops.
  • It has a recipe library with the green-yellow-red ratios prepared for you. Make the food to the instructions, get your ratio.
  • You can also add custom dishes to the library, which I’ve been wanting in a meal planning app. It’s time-consuming, but it works. (It also looks like you ate one calorie of vegetable stock.)
  • You can save daily tips and tricks to your personal library. Say I wanted to be able to refer to something multiple times, but I didn’t want to go hunting for it through the week, I can add it to my library.
  • Supposedly, there’s some sort of Group you get to be a part of to challenge each other and provide support — like Weight Watchers, I guess — but I haven’t seen it yet.

I completed my first week with Noom, and I nearly don’t hate it. Daily weigh-ins don’t bother me. Logging food is a pain, sure. The Goal Specialist is fine. I didn’t lose any weight, and my ratios were red-heavy.

It’s just… wine is a red food. And that makes me very sad.

I promised myself to try harder my second week. They say it right at the start that they can’t make you eat right or work out. Your job.

The closest thing to Noom I’ve ever tried is having a Beachbody coach, which was all sorts of annoying.

So, why Noom?

I saw an ad for it on Instagram, which is also why I own a pair of dress-pant yoga pants.

I will report back on this program… unless I cancel it.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯